Isabella's Age

Lilypie First Birthday tickers

Saturday, March 14, 2009

Weird feeling

Today I went and purchased a few bins to store Kaysen's stuff while we get the office ready and his room ready. I know I should have felt happy that his stuff was being stored to make room to get his room ready (which I won't do until after the referral) but I was sad. Sad that I won't get to see his stuff there everyday, sad thinking "Will I ever get to actually use this stuff? and if so, when?" and mostly sad because he isn't coming home for a long time and I want him home. This year will be a busy year for us as my parents will be moving in (once there home sells) and we will be renovating the house to accomodate them and give everyone their own space, but I still don't think it will be busy enough to make time go by faster. The great thing is that we will be busy with all kinds of stuff to maybe not have time to sit around and drown in self pitty.

It will be so nice to have my parents around for Kaysen. They won't be here all year round as they plan to travel now that my dad is retired, which will be nice as i'm sure we will all need a break from each other once in a while but I feel this is a good move and it will be great to have them around once Kaysen get's here. Once the attachement/adjusting stage is someone passed, meaning he knows who his mommy and daddy is, he will love to get to know them more and have them around. The first few months home may be tougher for him as he needs to sort of stick with Chris and I only but then i'm sure i'll never see him .... which may not be a good thing for me. My parents will be so happy to see him everyday, and to make them and him happy will be a great feeling. I think having not had children for so long, Chris and I will appreciate the extra help, and the occasional breaks. Even adoptive parents who go through what we are all going through will someday need a break, it's normal, it's life. I can already picture him running down to greet his "Memere and Pepere" in the morning, and the joy my parents will get from it fills my heart. I guess i'm just very family oriented and love to make my family smile. Wish us luck.... !!!


Craig and Jaclyn said...

THat is exactly what Craig and I are doign with my parents. Except neither of houses will accomodate both families so we're actively searching for a home. But it's hard because it needs to be in the right school boundaries, enough space for everyone...and most importantly the right price!!!
I so hope that you will find that the time goes by a lot faster than it has been. THere is absolutely NOTHING fun about waiting. NOTHING...not one part of waiting is fun or easy. But I promise it is so worth while.

Cara said...

Sounds like there's lots going on for you right now. Thinking of you and Chris. Best wishes to your parents too!


The Mannings said...

I hope all goes well with your parents moving in - I am sure you will fall into a routine that will work for everyone.
We decided to do international adoption over a private/domestic adoption because we felt that even though it might take a long time - in the end we WILL be parents and we WILL have a baby coming to our home. The same is true for you. It might take a while - longer than we would like but IT IS going to happen. Just think how fun it will be to unpack all of K's things and settle them into his new room - it will happen!!!!!

Sharla said...

What a blessing it will be for your parents, for you, and for your little one to all have each other! I hope the renos keep you very busy and the year flies by!